Relena gasped, struggling for breath as she flailed out, trying to keep her precarious hold on the ground, hanging inches above disaster. Horrified, she realized that there was no steady surface to grab on to. The brown-haired girl was being pulled from the edge, down into darkness, where she would drown in a sea of oblivion. She desperately clawed forward, but the ground was a slippery substance that kept sliding out from under her even as she strained forward, muscles aching.  Relena was unable to maintain more than a desperate, momentary hold on safety.

"Heero!!!"

Relena screamed, knowing he could hear her, that somewhere in the darkness that surrounded her, he was there.  Certainly, he would help her.  She needed him now, desperately.  Surely, he would be there for her when she needed him the most.

"Heero!!! Please!!!"

Relena could feel her arms tiring, all her muscles threatening to burst in pain, but she refused to give in.

//He'll be here…he'll help me…//

Relena looked up, compelled by some inner voice, and saw that he was standing right at her side, right over her, watching her hold on for her life.

"Heero…please…" She gasped.   "Help me…I'm falling…"

The brown-haired pilot watched her, his face impassive and expressionless.  His dark eyes were completely blank, with neither affection nor hatred, as if her situation didn't matter to him at all.

"Heero?"

Relena could feel herself slipping, her last desperate hold failing, but that didn't terrify her as much as the void in Heero's eyes.  She shook her head in horrified disbelief as he simply turned and walked away, disappearing back into the darkness.

"Heero!!  No!!! Don't leave me!! Please!!!"

/ "Relena-sama."/

"Heero!!"

Relena's hands were free, the fabric under them had finally run out, and she was clawing wildly for a grip in open air, falling helplessly into an endless abyss.

/ " Relena-sama!" /

"Heero!!  Help me!!!"

Relena stretched her arm out in a useless final gesture, falling backward through the endless, endless darkness that would quickly erase any memory of her, until it would be as if she had never been at all.

"Relena-sama!  Wake up!"

Relena blinked, gasping for air that was now real and cold in her lungs. Warm hands were holding her shoulders in a firm but gentle grip, shaking her slightly and severing her completely from the nightmare.  A tight embrace pulled her back into the real world, and she shivered uncontrollably, fear still racing through her body, setting all her senses on edge. 

"It's all right, Relena-sama. It was only a dream."

Relena bent forward into the warm embrace, trying to hold back a sob of almost childish terror. Her hand closed gently around a long, thick rope of blonde hair.

//Blonde…hair?//

Relena blinked a few times, still unsure of where she was, or what was going on, and looked up into Dorothy's blue eyes.

"Dorothy!  I…I…"

"You had a nightmare, Relena-sama.  I passed by your door and heard you cry out."

"Yes…I…" 

Relena shuddered, unable to brush off the feeling of helplessness the nightmare had flooded her with, of reaching out and realizing that no one would reach back. 

//No matter how frightened, how desperate I was…I was completely on my own. 
And I couldn't do it…not on my own.  I didn't survive.//

Still holding her tightly, Dorothy started to gently rub Relena's back. Her gentle touch was warm and soothing, she possessed a steady security the other girl desperately needed, clung to like a safety line.  For a moment, Relena didn't know what to think, but that confusion soon passed into a contented, peaceful calm. 

//This is all right…girls can do this for each other…it's not like Dorothy's a boy or anything…//

Relena blushed slightly, both at the other girl's closeness and her own suddenly…/detailed/ thoughts about that closeness.  Just because Dorothy wasn't a boy, just because no one else might see anything wrong with it didn't mean Relena couldn't still think things…/very/ embarrassing things.

//Quit it.  Do you /want/ her to think you're some kind of freak?!  She hates you, anyway.  You know that.//

Relena knew she should have probably been ashamed, that Dorothy's innocent touch could make her fantasize like some twittering airhead, but it was the first time she had ever been really this near to anyone before. 

Relena knew she had led a fairly sheltered life, basically walled away from the rest of the world since she had been born.  She had never been kissed or held closely by anyone before; no one had told her they loved her. Dorothy's hand on her shoulder, her embrace was the most intimate contact Relena had ever really had, and the most physical affection she had been shown in a long, long time.

//Even my family wasn't affectionate…we didn't hug or kiss much.  They were all kind, of course, but stoic. Very stoic.//

Relena didn't have the heart to think about life after that, and her current life, the person she became after her father's death.

//I have to be all business…I can't think about anything else, except what I have to do, or I'll fail everyone.  Other things don't matter.  Not now.//

"You've been working very hard, Relena-sama." 

Dorothy seemed to be reading her thoughts, still gently stroking her back, not moving away even though Relena was calmer now.  Was it just her imagination, or was the blonde girl teasing at her hair slightly, letting it slide through her fingers just a little too slowly?

//You're tired, Relena.  Very, very tired.  None of this would be going through your head if you weren't.  Just give it a rest.//

"It's my responsibility, Dorothy…it's very important that I uphold the Absolute Pacifism way of…that …" Relena blinked, losing her entire train of thought, and let her head fall, to rest on Dorothy's shoulder.  

"Oh…hell with it. Can we just quit the act? Call a truce?  Just for tonight?"

Dorothy's eyes widened in surprise.

"Act, Relena-sama?"

Relena sighed.

"The endless games…the barbs we throw at each other that no one else sees, the comments that simmer under the surface…  The fact that neither one of us likes each other very much."  Relena looked up into Dorothy's blue gaze and was not surprised to see a sly understanding there.

"I know you know what I mean, Dorothy."

The blonde girl only smiled.

"I was having fun, Relena-sama.  Weren't you?"

Relena closed her eyes, swallowing hard as a swirl of emotions she was too exhausted to even consider slammed into her all at once.

"I...yeah.  But...I…I…I just…I"

Relena choked back a sob, but the tears came despite her best efforts to stop them.

//Don't cry. You weren't kidding when you said she didn't like you, you know she's not who she seems to be. For god sakes, Relena, /don't/ cry in front of her.//

Relena moved away from the blonde girl, quickly wiping her eyes, doing her best not to break down completely.

"I'm sorry, Dorothy.  I'm just very, very tired…" 

Relena felt a pang of exasperated anger, as tears continued to flow around her fingertips, despite her best attempts to remain calm.  The anger only made things worse, mixing with vague but overwhelming disappointment, and that ever-present nagging voice, that she could never do the job she promised she could do, that everything she worked for, all she believed in, was doomed to failure.

That /she/ would fail, where her father would have succeeded.  That Relena Peacecraft would fall hard from her throne, and take everyone else with her.

//Damn it!  Damn it! /Damn it!/

"It's all right, Relena-sama.  I know what you're going through."

Relena blinked at the soft tone in Dorothy's voice, a husky half-whisper she had never heard before, and looked up into the other girl's face. 

"Dorothy…what?"

The girl's blue eyes trapped her gaze, wrapping her in a soft blanket of understanding, honest and true admiration…and maybe…something more…

//Yeah, right…Dorothy has always mocked me…always and /only/ mocked me. She never thought I was worth anything, and that Absolute Pacifism was more than a silly pipe dream.// 

Relena smiled despite herself. 

//Not that we didn't have some great arguments about that…//

"It's fun to disguise our disagreements, Relena-sama. To hide behind kind words and smiles, and argue politely in the spaces between…it's almost like our own secret code." 

Relena almost jumped, as once again, Dorothy seemed to read her thoughts. 

"You've risen to meet my challenge every time, Relena-sama, no matter what.  You're the only person who's returned to play my game, and you play it with such grace and style…a talent all your own."

Relena didn't know how to answer, still completely confused by the emotions she was seeing in the girl's hazy blue eyes, an almost perfect counterpoint to her half-cynical tone. 

//It isn't real…it couldn't be real.//

Disdainful taunting hidden behind compliment, an ironic, false concern, all consumed by the belief so strong it was almost fact that Relena was doomed to fail…

//and an idiot for even making the attempt//

….that was the Dorothy she knew.  Not this…not this caring…not this kindness.  Relena laughed once, a sharp, bitter bark that hung in the air as she shook her head almost angrily.

"This is a joke…this kindness, you…you…this is some sort of trick.  This is some sort of stupid, political trick."

Relena was only dully interested in that realization, too tired to even care much what the other girl would do to her now, now that she had said the words that had hung between them for so long.  Any emotion that wasn't consumed by weariness fell to sudden, bitter disappointment, and Relena realized she didn't really know why she was so upset.  The brown-haired girl knew she was right, knew Dorothy had to be playing some sort of political game…but she /really/ didn't want to be right…

//Is it so wrong for me to want something…to want someone?  Someone I can confide in…someone I can love, just for me. That I could work just for what we want, our future, and not anything else.  A life apart from Absolute Pacifism, apart from all the politics?  Someone who will love me back…is that so much to ask for??//

The tears were coming again, but before she could wipe them away, Dorothy's hands were there, gently brushing them aside, and Relena once again found herself back in the blonde girl's embrace.

"Stupid…such a stupid joke…" Relena choked out between sobs.

"They're the jokes, Relena-sama."

Dorothy half-stood, moving around the perimeter of the bed until she was resting with her back against the headboard, and the brown-haired girl was snugly wrapped in her arms.  Relena could hear Dorothy's heart beat from where her head rested on the other girl's chest, that pale skin only divided from her touch by the sheerest of fabrics.

Dorothy held her gently, one hand reaching up from time to time, to trace the curve of the brown-haired girl's ear with a fingertip, drawing an imaginary line from her cheekbone to her chin, twining a few strands of brown hair between her fingers.  Relena didn't know what to think, and so she didn't think anything at all.

//I'm still dreaming.  I must be dreaming…//

It was a long time until Dorothy spoke again, her words were bitter, and seethed with anger.

"All of them are idiots.  They have eyes, just like I do.  They watch you closely enough, they can see what goes on, what you have to deal with.  But do they care what they're doing to you?  None of them think twice…they're all like little boys with giant toys.  Even Lieutenant Noin.  More than willing to go out, to slash and burn and kill without any discrimination, while you stand by to try and explain their destruction to people who only want
vengeance."

The blonde chuckled, a cool, gravelly sound that sent a shiver down Relena's spine.

"It sounds so insane, even for me…but I know I'm really the only one who sees it.  I'm the only one who thinks there's something wrong."

Dorothy was smoothing Relena's hair as she spoke, rubbing her temples with the gentlest touch.  The brown-haired girl soon found that it was impossible to stay awake, no matter how much she wanted to hear what Dorothy was saying.  The words simply refused to make sense, all blurring together into a softly-spoken lullaby.

"Something's got to be done…because this is the first time…really the first time…I ever cared…." 

Dorothy paused, and when she spoke again her voice was barely a whisper, her breath tickling against the brown-haired girl's face, as if she were speaking directly in Relena's ear, the words speeding right to her heart.  They still didn't make sense, Relena was too tired to understand, but it felt as if the other girl were giving her some important secret, and that trust made her glow inside.

"You want to know why we differ, Relena-sama? It's simple, really. I think that, for Absolute Pacifism to work, someone's got to be the martyr. At the very beginning, someone's got to be willing to sacrifice everything for the peace of the world. I think that everyone here, has already decided…decided for you before you ever had the chance, that you're the one
who has to lose. You've got to suffer, so that they can all be happy."

Distantly, Relena felt arms tighten protectively around her.

"And I'll be damned if I'm going to let that happen…"

"Relena!  Miss Relena!!!"

Relena jumped from Dorothy's arms as if she were spring-loaded, leaping to her feet and scrambling to the door before she was even partially awake, reacting almost instinctively to the sound of panic. She opened the door, just a crack, to see a soldier standing, wide-eyed and panicked in the hallway.

"What?  What is it?"

"We've got problems, ma'am."

"What kind of problems?"

Relena's question was answered by a large explosion somewhere overhead, and the sound of people yelling orders down the hall.

Within five minutes, Dorothy found herself in a cold, empty bedroom, with the lights off and the door locked. Relena hadn't looked at the blonde once as she quickly dressed and ran out the door, already too busy trying to think of ways to talk her way out of one more crisis for the Sank kingdom.

End Chapter 2